9/11

a personal memory by Larry Mendte

It was my wife who told me.

I was working at NBC10 in Philadelphia. I anchored the news at 11 and wasn't used to waking up until at least 10.

My wife was anchoring the morning newscast at KYW in Philadelphia. She knew to call before 10 only if it was important. This was important.

"Do you see what's going on?" That's what my wife said to me when I answered the phone seconds after 9AM. She just got off the air.

"No, what?" I said, still half asleep.

"Turn on the TV. A plane flew into one of the World Trade Towers in New York." My wife sounded panicked.

I use to work at WABC in New York and remembered the story of the plane that crashed into the Empire State Building. To me - this was a tragedy - but not out of the realm of possibilities.

I turned on the TV to the Today Show in time to see the replay of the plane flying into the building - or so I thought.

"Oh my God!" my wife said. She started crying.

It all hit me at once. "Wait, is that another plane?"

"Yes," my wife said, "another plane into the other tower."

I understood right away. "We're under attack."

"What?" Dawn was still dealing with the overwhelming human tragedy and hadn't thought through the only logical conclusion.

"It can't be a coincidence..." And then I was silent as I watched NBC replay both crashes. Now it was my turn to say "Oh My God."

"What now?" my wife asked, as if to say "Please, no more."

"They aren't small planes." I said it to myself as much as Dawn. It was all sinking in. "They were airliners."

Both Dawn and I were silent for a minute. We, and millions of Americans, were watching a mass murder in progress. It was revolting.

"I have to go to work, " I finally broke the silence that seemed to stretch on forever.

"I love you," Dawn said through tears. "I love you too."

I called work to say I was on my way. Then I switched on the radio while I got dressed. It was WIP, sports radio, and 76ers' President and friend Pat Croce was on promoting his new book.

I quickly called WIP Morning Team Co-Host Rhea Hughes. "Do you know what's going on?"

Rhea was frustrated, "I know, I know. We need to shut Pat up. Hey, can you go on with us?"

"Sure."

And that was my first report on the the 9/11 attacks.

I as on WIP throughout the day. I called as i got ready to leave. I called on the ride in. I called from the newsroom. I continued to call until we decided to leave national coverage and take over locally. That happened right after NBC showed people jumping from the flames to their death. "We are not showing that on our air." News Director Steve Schwaid announced in the newsroom as he pointed at one of the TV screens that lined the wall.

Immediately after that I was on the air, on and off, mostly on, for three weeks.

I was proud of our coverage. I was proud of everyone's coverage.

There was no hyperbole, no sensationalism, no fluff and no mistakes. The story and the task at hand was too big, too important.

Facts, clarity and calm took their rightful place at the top of the newsroom priority list. No talk of promotion or marketing, all were instinctively deemed frivolous in the face of the biggest story of our lives.

When I think back on September 11, 2001, it always bothers me that I didn't cry.

My wife Dawn cried immediately. Many in the NBC1- newsroom uncontrollably broke into tears.

I remember the line from one of the great movies of all time, Broadcast News, whn the Albert Brooks character says "You have to get out of TV News before you lose the ability to cry."

I remember being concerned that I didn't feel what everyone else was feeling. they were right. I was wrong.

A week later I was reading the names of those from the Delaware Valley who died in the attacks. There were so many names. I read the names and watched the monitor at their photographs to make certain the director and I were in sync.

There was something about that moment. Of reading the names, of seeing the faces, of knowing they were my neighbors, that made me lose it. My voice cracked and I had to take a moment to regain my composure, but I continued on.

On the ride home, late that night, I bawled a weeks worth of tears. I had held back all emotion so I could do my job. It was good to let it out.

I have cried since. When I found out that one of the cancer stricken children I interviewed for the Alex's Lemonade Stand Documentary had died unexpectedly, I closed my office door at CBS3 and cried for 15 minutes. After a month of interviewing children with cancer and parents who would give their own lives to save their child, again it all had to come out.

The next year when the station allowed me to turn the documentary into a day long telethon, I lost it on the air. It was during the report of another child I met - lost to cancer.

These are my thoughts, on this date, 8 years after.

As with all of you, my reflection is very personal. That was the ripple effect of the tragedy. When the planes hit, we were all hit somewhere deep in our very beings.

I was in New York to anchor the news in 2006 from ground zero. I spent time with and reported on the family members of 9/11 victims. I went to the homes of children left fatherless or motherless by the tragedy. Some of them only remember the parent they lost from photographs.

None of us can feel the loss they feel.

But we all still feel a loss and, like them, we hold on to memories.

I am homored when people tell me that they first heard about 9/11 from my report on WIP. I am still proud of television news on that day - and the days after. Sadly, TV news has retreated once again from that feeling of awesome responsibility to a quest for ratings at all costs. But it is still comforting to know what it can be when we need it.

Most of all, I am relieved that I did not lose the ability to cry.

***Please leave your personal memories of 9/11 in the comment section.***